“I was only 24 years old at the time. Stress? The “daughter sale” evolved into a non-monetary tradition of asking the father before proposing. Asking a woman's father for permission is a formality. The father would then present his daughter’s hand to be joined in marriage. Why doesn't a girl have to ask a guy's parents if she can marry him? I'm guessing it stems from a time when women were essentially property of men, and responsibility for them passed from father to husband. A groom asking the father-in-law for permission to marry his daughter comes from a time when women had little autonomy. I was actually surprised at how common the practice still is. If, however your daughter or her boyfriend or believes this tradition is a nice touch that will help cement in-law favor, be prepared with ideas about how to respond to your future son-in-law. Is the tradition of asking permission from the father of the bride rooted in sexism? Whether you are on board with this long tradition of gaining the approval from the father, or want to show your respect to your partner’s family, there are a few tips you will want to know before asking father's permission to marry. A man would ask a girl’s father for permission to marry his daughter, not because he was in love, but because he would be receiving a piece of land or a huge amount of money from his new wife. We’re working on #equality, after all. In today's modern world, couples often discuss marriage together, coming to a mutual agreement rather than a formal proposal. Online commenters go crazy Unless you both are very traditional, it’s sexist and insulting to seek patriarchal permission. Watch the stress this man feels as he prepares to ask permission for the most important event of his life! Asking a father for permission to marry his daughter is a traditional sort of thing. And why do they ask just the father rather than both parents? As is a man asking a woman's father for permission for the daughter to marry. You could have easily asked if she thought it would be a good idea to ask her father for his blessing etc. What about situations when the father does not like the guy for stupid reasons. Swap permission for blessing. Some people argue that asking her father for permission is sexist, chauvinist, and recalls a time when women were treated like property. and you would have dodged this bullet. It may also help enhance your relationship with your future in-laws. Here’s why. By your fiance asking your father for your hand in marriage only makes your father feel great and that makes them both look at each other differently and have a bit little more respect towards eachother. A loving, beautiful gesture of respect, symbolizing that this man recognizes that when he marries the woman, he marries her entire clan. In today’s world, the old tradition of asking a father permission to marry his daughter can feel quite antiquated. Men would ask a woman’s father for permission to marry her because the man would either be getting a dowry (to go WAY back in history) or because the man would presumably be taking over her care. Ms. Cox (nee Knowles) says that while asking for her father’s permission was a formality, she wanted Mr. Cox to do so. Video of me asking my fiance's father permission to marry her. “ Personally, I don’t think asking for permission is relevant anymore. But perhaps second only to women overwhelmingly folding their names and identities into their husbands when they marry is men asking their girlfriend’s father for permission to marry … Woman slams ‘outdated’ and ‘sexist’ custom of men asking fathers for permission to propose… so what do YOU think? 1: You are asking for a blessing, not permission. The past 20 or 30 years have seen a significant relaxing of some of the more formal elements of the process, including the age-old tradition of the prospective groom asking permission of his father-in-law-to-be for his daughter’s hand in marriage. A newly married couple cannot “leave” Mom and Dad if the couple is still depending on them for housing or financial support. In 2014, the guys most likely to ask for permission are those least likely to need it. I think more of a heads up rather than asking permission would do if the person asking felt it necessary.” READ MORE: How to write a flawless father of the bride speech Father … Online commenters go crazy Unless you both are very traditional, it ’ s for. Parental permission to marry her at the time is important for some women that you make use this! Origin dates back all the way to biblical times this man feels as he prepares ask! 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